Gossip column

Advice from Mom
By Rita Lessard

On Tuesday, August 18, Tom and I attended the annual chicken barbecue for the Crediton Zion Church. This event is always well attended, and a lot of fun with plenty of food and good fellowship. It’s so nice living in a small town, knowing so many people and hearing the stories about the health and welfare of the many friends one has acquired over the years. I find that a lot of gossip is spread at these affairs, and although the women probably hold the record for being gossipy, the men seemed to be just as good. As a matter of fact, I was listening to a conversation with two very humorous gentlemen.
“So Gerry,” the one man said. “I met Gladys the other day on main street.”
“Oh, ya,” Gerry replied. “I hear she hasn’t been feeling too well.”
“I don’t know about that,” said the other fellow. “When I mentioned that I had heard about her being bedridden, her reply was, ‘Hardly. I haven’t been bedridden since my husband died five years ago.’”
That Gladys always was a cracker.

Sports injuries
My best regards for a speedy recovery for my young friend Tanya, who fell off her bike and now has her arm in a sling. It’s so sad because she will be out of action for a while; there go her golfing and slo-pitch seasons.
My mother was quite active in her day, but wasn’t exempt from injuring her limbs. I recall the evening she had a bowling date and put her knee out.
This was a fluke of an accident. As she was wiggling into her girdle, she somehow veered right when she should have gone left, and snap, the knee went out of place.
“Darn,” she exclaimed, “this will never do.” Always quick thinking, she just gave her knee a good whack and put it back in place. There, good as new, and she went on to bowl the best game of the season. Feisty, that mother of mine. Lord only knows how she could bowl in that contraption in the first place. I guess fashion was important. Comfort must have been secondary. You certainly wouldn’t want to pass gas. It wouldn’t have anywhere to escape. Like they say, “Nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide.”

This week’s tips

  • No need for laces – When plastic tips fall off your laces, just dip the frayed ends into clean nail polish.
  • To ease off a stuck ring, rub mayonnaise over the swollen finger, and the ring will slide off with ease.
  • Get tar off your car – Spread a layer of mayo on the tar and let sit for five minutes. Wipe away with a clean cloth.